Weird and Awful Animals
Kangaroos have their testicles higher on their abdomen than their penises. They have a separate cloaca for solid and liquid waste. Everything about kangaroo reproduction is weird and upsetting.
The Bootlace Worm is a long unsegmented worm that regularly reaches 5 to 15 metres in length. One specimen was measured at over 50 metres (but may have been stretched).
Also when I'm alarmed I produce a large amount of thick, pungent mucous that contains a strong neurotoxin!
Terrible!
The screamer is a kind of bird that has air pockets in its skin that make it crackle when compressed, like bubblewrap.
People don't eat me because my meat has a terrible, unpalatable spongy texture. Also I love yelling!
The Spanish Ribbed Newt has a defense mechanism where it pushes the sharp tips of its ribs through its own skin, presumably horrifying predators into leaving them alone.
What the...oh god no, no no!
Actually my exposed rib tips are also coated in poison!
Even worse!